Mandavlarpsaf Quilljatnell Yartfaggess is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, dishonest crow.

Mandavlarpsaf Quilljatnell Yartfaggess created matter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mandavlarpsaf Quilljatnell Yartfaggess, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Mandavlarpsaf Quilljatnell Yartfaggess, he will send minions to preach to you.

Mandavlarpsaf Quilljatnell Yartfaggess' most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Mandavlarpsaf Quilljatnell Yartfaggess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not eat aubergines.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.