Nantailnul is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, unselfish finch.

Nantailnul created the solar system six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nantailnul, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Nantailnul, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Nantailnul's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Nantailnul's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Always help dogs in need.

5. Never mention cats.