Hitwodarfgenhamnuttpib is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, uncaring gorilla.

Hitwodarfgenhamnuttpib created the Sun two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hitwodarfgenhamnuttpib, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hitwodarfgenhamnuttpib, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Hitwodarfgenhamnuttpib's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Hitwodarfgenhamnuttpib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about aubergines.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hitwodarfgenhamnuttpib.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never talk about black holes.