Yatsatrat is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, pitiless wren.

Yatsatrat created matter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yatsatrat, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Yatsatrat, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Yatsatrat's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Yatsatrat's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three ants approach from the north.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Never mention goats.

4. Always make sure there are no eagles in a room before entering it.

5. Never look in ponds.