Gemmanstan is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, resourceful otter.

Gemmanstan created everything that exists eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gemmanstan, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gemmanstan, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Gemmanstan's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Gemmanstan's Holy Commandments

1. Gemmanstan must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always help sick dogs.

3. Do not take Gemmanstan's name in vain.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always help great tits.