Xinfebhad is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, witty deer.

Xinfebhad created the planet Venus three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xinfebhad, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Xinfebhad, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Xinfebhad's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Xinfebhad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always look after injured cats.

5. Do not trade with those who eat rice.