Rotgigsid is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, narcissistic squirrel.

Rotgigsid created the planet Saturn eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rotgigsid, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Rotgigsid, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Rotgigsid's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Rotgigsid's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never think ill of sick sheep.

3. Do not take Rotgigsid's name in vain.

4. Do not trade with those who eat melons.

5. Put Rotgigsid first in all things.