Arfloghud is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, tranquil wasp.

Arfloghud created a bottom quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfloghud, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Arfloghud, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Arfloghud's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Arfloghud's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. You must never eat apples.

5. Never mention seals.