Kipfonbab is a god.

He takes the form of a small, irritating hydra.

Kipfonbab created a top quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kipfonbab, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Kipfonbab, he will be very unhappy.

Kipfonbab's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Kipfonbab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Put Kipfonbab first in all things.

3. Never jump in holy places.

4. Eagles are not to be trusted.

5. You must love Kipfonbab.