Wonrowkem is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, overgenerous hamster.

Wonrowkem created Asia eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wonrowkem, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Wonrowkem, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Wonrowkem's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Wonrowkem's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Wonrowkem.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Run away if eight snails approach from the east.

5. Never paint your hands white.