Wegbinbum is a god.

He takes the form of a small, bad-tempered lizard.

Wegbinbum created humankind six million years ago.

If you believe in Wegbinbum, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Wegbinbum, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Wegbinbum's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Wegbinbum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat gooseberries.

2. Never mention turtles.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never wear brown rings.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.