Appstiknurl Nullfobnill is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, selfish hyena.

Appstiknurl Nullfobnill created an electron three million years ago.

If you believe in Appstiknurl Nullfobnill, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Appstiknurl Nullfobnill, it will turn you into a puffin.

Appstiknurl Nullfobnill's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Appstiknurl Nullfobnill's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from white sheep for they are unholy.

2. You must love Appstiknurl Nullfobnill.

3. Never talk about otters.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Appstiknurl Nullfobnill.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.