Jarnteencanjen is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, clever crane.

Jarnteencanjen created a quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Jarnteencanjen, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jarnteencanjen, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Jarnteencanjen's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Jarnteencanjen's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt dogs.

2. Do not hurt porpoises.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never write about galaxies.

5. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.