Tagpangfeb is a god.

He takes the form of a small, thoughtless cow.

Tagpangfeb created life three million years ago.

If you believe in Tagpangfeb, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Tagpangfeb, he will not invite you to parties.

Tagpangfeb's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Tagpangfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Never talk about fire.