Gemgessdam is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, charitable gorilla.

Gemgessdam created the planet Venus two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gemgessdam, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gemgessdam, she will ignore you.

Gemgessdam's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Gemgessdam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate foxes.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always wear pink.

5. Fast once a month.