Hanwegyimdadyik is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, flying warg.

Hanwegyimdadyik created a Higgs boson three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hanwegyimdadyik, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Hanwegyimdadyik, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Hanwegyimdadyik's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Hanwegyimdadyik's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about comets.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. Retreat if four dogs approach from the south.

5. Always take life seriously.