Dodtailcem is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, slow dolphin.

Dodtailcem created a bottom quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Dodtailcem, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Dodtailcem, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Dodtailcem's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Dodtailcem's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not dye your hair pink.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. You must never eat melons.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.