Fidruttlip is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, awe-inspiring swan.

Fidruttlip created Africa six billion years ago.

If you believe in Fidruttlip, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Fidruttlip, she will turn you into a rock.

Fidruttlip's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Fidruttlip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair cyan.

2. Do not shave your hands.

3. Never mention otters.

4. Never sit near turtles.

5. Do not skip in public.