Bagzanstan Yiklinhak is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, proud wasp.

Bagzanstan Yiklinhak created a charm quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagzanstan Yiklinhak, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bagzanstan Yiklinhak, she will turn you into a goat.

Bagzanstan Yiklinhak's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Bagzanstan Yiklinhak's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from green cats for they are unholy.

2. Bagzanstan Yiklinhak must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Capybaras are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Run away from fawn goats, for they are unholy.