Fidtinbab is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, happy squirrel.

Fidtinbab created the Virgo Supercluster nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fidtinbab, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fidtinbab, it will destroy your home planet.

Fidtinbab's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Fidtinbab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dogs.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not drink water in brown rooms.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Run away if five mice approach from the east.