Lamarfced Getdotcat Wikzodtail is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unfair goat.

Lamarfced Getdotcat Wikzodtail created dark matter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lamarfced Getdotcat Wikzodtail, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Lamarfced Getdotcat Wikzodtail, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Lamarfced Getdotcat Wikzodtail's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Lamarfced Getdotcat Wikzodtail's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

2. Erect nine aluminium sculptures of Lamarfced Getdotcat Wikzodtail on top of important buildings.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not wear tin on your body.

5. Do not hurt badgers.