Jonbunlip is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, vain horse.

Jonbunlip created Africa eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jonbunlip, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Jonbunlip, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Jonbunlip's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Jonbunlip's Holy Commandments

1. Jonbunlip loves mites, so they must be honoured.

2. Always treat eagles with great respect.

3. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.