Fudjarnveen is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, witless rat.

Fudjarnveen created the Sun three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fudjarnveen, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fudjarnveen, he will refuse to believe in you.

Fudjarnveen's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Fudjarnveen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt nematodes.

2. Do not speak about pineapples.

3. Always wear yellow.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always pray immersed in water.