Jabsidgan is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, able dugong.

Jabsidgan created the Cigar Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jabsidgan, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Jabsidgan, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Jabsidgan's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Jabsidgan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Do not wear white clothing.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never play with disobedient children.