Betfatsan is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, generous troll.

Betfatsan created matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Betfatsan, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Betfatsan, he will curse you with boils.

Betfatsan's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Betfatsan's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always wear purple.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Always help otters.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.