Dibtinxuck is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, merciless chicken.

Dibtinxuck created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dibtinxuck, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dibtinxuck, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dibtinxuck's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Dibtinxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dibtinxuck.

5. Erect five silver sculptures of Dibtinxuck on top of important buildings.