Fatnellflag is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, compassionate parrot.

Fatnellflag created carbon six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fatnellflag, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fatnellflag, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fatnellflag's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Fatnellflag's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear dresses.

2. Never hurt dolphins.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Always make sure there are no badgers in a building before entering it.