Sognellcimquillbethomget is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unthinking raccoon.

Sognellcimquillbethomget created life four million years ago.

If you believe in Sognellcimquillbethomget, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Sognellcimquillbethomget, she will turn you into a mouse.

Sognellcimquillbethomget's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Sognellcimquillbethomget's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat tomatoes.

2. Worship no other gods but Sognellcimquillbethomget.

3. You must pray to Sognellcimquillbethomget seven times a day.

4. Sognellcimquillbethomget loves horses, so they must be respected.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.