Hudfagkonnarl is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, smart hamster.

Hudfagkonnarl created humanity four million years ago.

If you believe in Hudfagkonnarl, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hudfagkonnarl, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Hudfagkonnarl's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Hudfagkonnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into orange rooms.

2. Never paint your back violet.

3. Always help sick goats.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.