Cipkemdoss is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, loving monkey.

Cipkemdoss created the planet Jupiter eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cipkemdoss, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Cipkemdoss, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Cipkemdoss' most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Cipkemdoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always treat foxes with great respect.

4. Do not wear indigo clothing.

5. Never pour water over plants.