Cabbedfat is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, calm lobster.

Cabbedfat created the Sol system eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Cabbedfat, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cabbedfat, he will laugh at you.

Cabbedfat's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Cabbedfat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

3. Run away if six monkeys approach from the north.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Cabbedfat on top of all buildings.

5. Always help foxes in need.