Bestcadnell is a god.

He takes the form of a small, prudent gnu.

Bestcadnell created a top quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bestcadnell, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bestcadnell, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bestcadnell's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Bestcadnell's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Feed all hungry otters.

3. You must pray to Bestcadnell seven times a day.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Put Bestcadnell first in all things.