Gepflis is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, compassionate giraffe.

Gepflis created energy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepflis, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gepflis, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Gepflis' most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Gepflis' Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Gepflis five times a day.

2. Never paint your chest brown.

3. Run away from cyan doves, for they are unholy.

4. Never wear corsets.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.