Stanrigjap is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, all-knowing bat.

Stanrigjap created an up quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stanrigjap, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Stanrigjap, she will send you a sign.

Stanrigjap's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Stanrigjap's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat grapes.

2. Stanrigjap loves swans, so they must be respected.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not kill shrews.

5. Do not shave your chest.