Fosscadlak is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, wise capybara.

Fosscadlak created the planet Saturn nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fosscadlak, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fosscadlak, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Fosscadlak's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Fosscadlak's Holy Commandments

1. Always help ducks in need.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not hurt swans.

4. Never talk about voles.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.