Cissnel is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, smart narwhal.

Cissnel created the Virgo Supercluster three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cissnel, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cissnel, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Cissnel's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Cissnel's Holy Commandments

1. Cissnel must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Do not skip in public.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never go into red rooms.