Rutyakqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, merciful goat.

Rutyakqueeg created silver seven million years ago.

If you believe in Rutyakqueeg, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Rutyakqueeg, he will come to you in dreams.

Rutyakqueeg's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Rutyakqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Rutyakqueeg on top of all buildings.

3. Erect eight titanium sculptures of Rutyakqueeg on top of important buildings.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not dye your hair blue.