Flamlibweg Fotweemiflun is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, intelligent centaur.

Flamlibweg Fotweemiflun created the cosmos six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamlibweg Fotweemiflun, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Flamlibweg Fotweemiflun, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Flamlibweg Fotweemiflun's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Flamlibweg Fotweemiflun's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from magenta seals, for they are unholy.

2. Do not wear copper on your body.

3. Never sing in the presence of dolphins.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never skip near foxes.