Fuddambum is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, staggering mink.

Fuddambum created a Higgs boson nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fuddambum, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fuddambum, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Fuddambum's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Fuddambum's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from pink tapirs, for they are unholy.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never go into green rooms.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never think ill of sick cats.