Hapkonveen is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, passionate tapir.

Hapkonveen created gold twelve years ago.

If you believe in Hapkonveen, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hapkonveen, she will curse you with boils.

Hapkonveen's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Hapkonveen's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear indigo tights.

2. Never wear trousers.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. You must love Hapkonveen.

5. Never play with disobedient children.