Zedpinzen is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, passionate dolphin.

Zedpinzen created gold two million years ago.

If you believe in Zedpinzen, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Zedpinzen, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Zedpinzen's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Zedpinzen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Feed all hungry badgers.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.