Boghascum is a god.

She takes the form of a small, wise squirrel.

Boghascum created tapeworms three billion years ago.

If you believe in Boghascum, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Boghascum, she will turn you into a sheep.

Boghascum's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Boghascum's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never write about gravity.