Cutgepbom is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, emotional shrew.

Cutgepbom created the planet Earth four billion years ago.

If you believe in Cutgepbom, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Cutgepbom, it will laugh at you.

Cutgepbom's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Cutgepbom's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention voles.

2. Always help seals.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cutgepbom.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.