Baptiknadten is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, intelligent tortoise.

Baptiknadten created the Black Eye Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Baptiknadten, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Baptiknadten, it will turn you into a plant.

Baptiknadten's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Baptiknadten's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Baptiknadten's priests.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not take Baptiknadten's name in vain.

5. Do not listen to music.