Pibfumfon is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, sapient lobster.

Pibfumfon created the planet Earth four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pibfumfon, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Pibfumfon, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Pibfumfon's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Pibfumfon's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not hurt gulls.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. You must love Pibfumfon.

5. Always help badgers.