Gedladxucbon is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, resourceful lobster.

Gedladxucbon created the Whirlpool Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Gedladxucbon, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gedladxucbon, he will torture you forever.

Gedladxucbon's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Gedladxucbon's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear green.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Run away if eight snakes approach from the north.

4. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.