Guportapp is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, fussy gerbil.

Guportapp created bats seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Guportapp, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Guportapp, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Guportapp's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Guportapp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat peas.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not speak about cherries.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not commit murder.