Ligflatbopfon is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, deceitful gorilla.

Ligflatbopfon created a bottom quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ligflatbopfon, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ligflatbopfon, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Ligflatbopfon's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Ligflatbopfon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt squirrels.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not wear zinc on your body.

5. Do not listen to music.