Vonkdintad is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, almighty sheep.

Vonkdintad created Mount Everest two million years ago.

If you believe in Vonkdintad, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Vonkdintad, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Vonkdintad's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Vonkdintad's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat turnips.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Moths are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never skip near birds.

5. Do not kill hamsters.