Larpboddotkan is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, thoughtless dryad.

Larpboddotkan created the world five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Larpboddotkan, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Larpboddotkan, he will destroy your home planet.

Larpboddotkan's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Larpboddotkan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear platinum on your body.

2. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

3. Feed all hungry whales.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. You must pray to Larpboddotkan nine times a day.